The Bitch-o-matic, a free Humor selector.

Mobile Users: 1st Question ▶

turnphone

Hold Mobile Device Horizontally

What is your Humor IQ?
Test Your Humor knowledge with these The Bitch-o-matic Quizzes

More Fun With SelectSmart:
Which anime & manga are best? Anime & Manga Selector

Religion Selector	Running Shoes Selector.	Your best college values!
The Harry Potter Spell Selector.
The career that you are best suited for is...	New or used, best smartphone for you!	Which car or truck is best for you?
Cast your vote! Take this Humor Poll: The Bitch-o-matic
	Know the US cities that you'd most love and those you'd most hate: City Selector

Selector of the moment:

Humor

The Bitch-o-matic

0 from 0 votes.
See 32 visitors' top results
Created November 2003.
A SelectSmart.com Selector by Skylar
for ages women from all around the globe have been asking: "what does my neighbour's wife, boss, laundry cashier and supermarket cheese tester woman say about me?" now we have the answer! just take this test and prepare to be bitchalyzed! Disclaimer.


Privacy info.

The first selector question is below.

1. Are you 13 or older? (you need to be over 13 years old to be llegaly a bitch)

Yes 👍

No 👎

No preference 🤔

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

2. are you a woman? (if you are a man pretending to be a woman and you have no lipstick on your face, the answer is "no"))

Yes 👍

No 👎

No preference 🤔

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

3. Are you from Canada, you bitch?

Yes 👍

No 👎

No preference 🤔

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

4. In relationships, do things usually go your way?

Yes 👍

No 👎

No preference 🤔

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

5. Have you ever gotten pregnant intentionally, just to lure someone into a lasting relationship?

Yes 👍

No 👎

No preference 🤔

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

6. have you ever been on a catfight?

Yes 👍

No 👎

No preference 🤔

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

7. how about a fist fight?

Yes 👍

No 👎

No preference 🤔

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

8. have you ever slapped someone?

Yes 👍

No 👎

No preference 🤔

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

9. Have you ever kicked someone in the nuts?

Yes 👍

No 👎

No preference 🤔

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

10. Have you ever given someone the silent treatment?

Yes 👍

No 👎

No preference 🤔

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

11. Do you wear fake nails?

Yes 👍

No 👎

No preference 🤔

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

12. If so, do you often find dried blood beneath them?

Yes 👍

No 👎

No preference 🤔

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

13. Do you carry mace or pepper spray for self defense?

Yes 👍

No 👎

No preference 🤔

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

14. Do you have more enemies than friends?

Yes 👍

No 👎

No preference 🤔

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

15. Would you say your mom is a bitch?

Yes 👍

No 👎

No preference 🤔

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

16. Do any of your screen names contain the words "angel", "cat", "qtie", "69", "tigress", "vam", or "vixen"?

Yes 👍

No 👎

No preference 🤔

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

17. Have you ever been to prison, either to visit or because you kind of had to go there?

Yes 👍

No 👎

No preference 🤔

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

18. Have you ever used your TEETH during oral sex (on a man or a woman)?

Yes 👍

No 👎

No preference 🤔

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

19. Have you ever threatened to commit suicide just to get attention?

Yes 👍

No 👎

No preference 🤔

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

20. Have you ever pushed someone in a wheelchair over wet concrete and left them there? Ha ha.

Yes 👍

No 👎

No preference 🤔

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

21. Do you avoid beggars on the street?

Yes 👍

No 👎

No preference 🤔

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

22. Have you ever stood someone up?

Yes 👍

No 👎

No preference 🤔

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

23. Have you ever dumped anyone?

Yes 👍

No 👎

No preference 🤔

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

24. Have you ever cheated on someone?

Yes 👍

No 👎

No preference 🤔

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

Now that you have answered all the questions, continue to the Show Me My Results! button below.

Just for fun, predict what your #1 result will be.Your prediction will not influence your results.

Currently Trending Humor Selectors

More popular selectors: Mouseover for information
Alphabet Personality Test

What Kind of Name Should You H

Random Blasphemies

Find your true Spirit name

What high school clique would

What is your Inner Non-Sequitu

Do You Have A Mental Illness?

What's Your College Major?

Babies: Are you having a boy o

Social Outcast Selector

thE pUnk TEst

Tyler's Coolness Test: How Coo

What kind of bitch are you?

Que personaje eres de Los padr

Which Inanimate Object Are You

What's your Hawaiian name?

Are you addicted to online qui

How PUNK are you?

What Urban Legend will you be

What would your super power be

Who out of LOTR to marry?

Your place in the Mafia

What is your hidden Mutant Pow

Which Sexual Fantasy are YOU?

How Good Are You?

What kind of army soldier are

What Kind of Guy Would Fall Fo

Pregnancy Test

What Inanimate Object Are YOU?

What kind of weed are you?

How to tell if your dog hates

The Mod Beauties: Which Chick

Are you an obnoxious customer?

What inanimate object are you

ATPE Are you pink or evil?

Which feminine hygiene product

Do you have a sick mind?

Personality Quiz

Are you a monster in bed? (Thi

Olympus Apartments - Official

Stupid questions for Stupid Pe

Are You a Comedian?

What Emoticon Mood Are You?

What Kind of Vegetable Are You

Who are you most likely to mar

WHAT FRUIT ARE YOU?!?!

What kind of sheep are you?

What will the religion of your

How Hairy are you?

What Kind of Canadian Are You?

what flavor snapple are you?

How psychotic are you?

What superhero are you?

What is your mood?

are you a wannabe, dork, loser

What type of student are you?

Which Troubled Teen Are You?

whats your rude nickname

Which Body Part are you?

How Inappropriate Are You?

What's Your Mental Age?

Which Ex-boyfriend are you?

What is your bitchy personalit

Which Glay member best suits y

What Junk Food Are You?

What Color Crayon Would You Be

Which JC body part are you?

Type of Underwear

Which of Nora's Ex-boyfriends

What kind of Rebel are you? =P

Is he a Jerk?

How Big of a Harry Potter Fan

How Insane Are You???

What Epic Character Would You

Are You Making BAD Quizzes?

Would you survive through a zo

Don't See It? Find All The Humor Pages Here.

Are you well-read on the subject of Humor?
Write an article about it in

Let's see if The Bitch-o-matic gets your results right.

All Rights Reserved. SelectSmart^® is a registered trademark. | Contact SelectSmart.com | Advertise on SelectSmart.com | Buy this site