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Humor

Are you an obnoxious customer?

5 from 5 votes.
See 2,283 visitors' top results
Created August 2000.
A SelectSmart.com Selector by Chad Hoolihan
This is a test to determine if you are the kind of customer cashiers tell horror stories about. I've worked in various grocery stores and this test is based on the complaints I've heard from cashiers time and time again. This test is not meant to be an indictment of anyone's shopping style, but it might be something to think about depending on your results...

The first selector question is below.

1. Do you flagrantly and defiantly disregard the "NO Shoes, NO Shirt, NO Service" rule?

Yes

No

No preference

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

2. If you have to wait in line, even for a short time, will you get huffy and dart to another line to save three seconds?

Yes

No

No preference

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

3. Do you carry on heated cell phone conversations while the cashier rings up your order, sometimes even oblivious to the fact that you are at the store?

Yes

No

No preference

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

4. Do you view your coupons as though they are your children, becoming personally offended if one is rejected?

Yes

No

No preference

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

5. Do you discipline your children loudly and aggressively while you are shopping?

Yes

No

No preference

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

6. Do you avoid letting whatever bad day you might be having affect your attitude toward the cashier?

Yes

No

No preference

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

7. Have you ever indignantly declared to the cashier, or whoever was handy, that you would "Never return to this store again!"

Yes

No

No preference

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

8. Did you return?

Yes

No

No preference

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

9. Do you ever zip into the express lane knowing full well that you have too many items, hoping the cashier won't notice?

Yes

No

No preference

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

10. If you were caught engaged in the above activity, did you say "Oh, I'm sorry. I wasn't paying attention"?

Yes

No

No preference

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

11. Are you a friend or relative of high-ranking store personnel and make it a point to inform the cashier of this in order to subtly (or not so subtly) suggest that you deserve special treatment?

Yes

No

No preference

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

12. Do you treat your shopping experience like a military operation? (Every aspect of the shopping is planned to perfection. If there is any deviation, however small, war is declared on the perceived offender.)

Yes

No

No preference

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

13. Do you watch the cashier ring up your order with frightening vigilance, pointing out every item that is supposed to be on sale before the cashier can scan it?

Yes

No

No preference

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

14. Do you come up to the register with an enormous amount of groceries, only to end up deciding that you don't want most of them?

Yes

No

No preference

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

15. Do you generally hold the cashier personally reponsible for any inconviences you experience while shopping, even if they had nothing to do with any of your problems?

Yes

No

No preference

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

16. Will you haggle, cajole, or argue with a cashier to the bitter end if you think you can save a few pennies?

Yes

No

No preference

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

17. Do you discuss your personal life with the cashier in elaborate and endless detail?

Yes

No

No preference

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

18. Have you ever thrown anything at a cashier, or threatened violence?

Yes

No

No preference

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

19. Have you ever held up a line over some trivial dispute, and then tried to draw blame from yourself and onto the cashier by sanctimoniously saying "Just finish my order, there are people waiting in line!"

Yes

No

No preference

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

20. Do you realize that the motto "The customer is always right" does not necessarily apply to stark, raving lunatics or opportunists?

Yes

No

No preference

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

21. Do you automatically assume that the cashier is beneath you or an idiot?

Yes

No

No preference

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

22. Do you purposely use coupons that you know don't match what you purchased?

Yes

No

No preference

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

23. Are you considerate of your fellow shoppers?

Yes

No

No preference

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

24. Do you realize that the world does not revolve around you?

Yes

No

No preference

Prioritize your choice above:

High Medium Low

Now that you have answered all the questions, continue to the Show Me My Results! button below.

Just for fun, predict what your #1 result will be.Your prediction will not influence your results.

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