K/S bought a condo for S's M/D to stay until they were older and needed to move need to move to assisted living.
D died in 2007 - M has lived there with T, daughter,part-time and sitter part-time 2 days week.
S was entrusted by D before his death, to be responsible for M via a POA. S has done that for 7 years.
M is now age 90 and is mentally/physically declining - what next?
There have also been irregularities in finances and living conditions so her living arrangements need to be changed.
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M continues to stay at K's condo alone and take the chance that Mom can take care of herself. Mom has at times moments of clarity but primarily has limited function.
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Stay at K's condo with T there
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M and T both move out of condo and Mom is cared for by T in an apt
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Moves in with S & K
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M moves to Assisted Living place - Horizon Bay
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NO
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NO
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NO
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NO
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YES
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At age 90, independent living is no longer an option.
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NO
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T wants M to stay there so that she has a place to live.
T prevented S from entering K condo to ocoheck on M. S left without a fuss. S then asked T to vacate premises.
S detailed to T all the negative behavior and actions that T had taken against M. S/S notified T to vacate condo by May 1.
S/K told T that if she left the condo, they would then decide the best place for M to go.
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NO
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Increases risk from present conditions because Mom would be alone and financially Mom does not have enough $ to pay for her own house and living expenses.
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NO
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It would be the same risk as being alone & independent in K's condo.
K & S are not home 24/7.
A normal house is not safe environment for someone with disability issues and dementia.
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HB is a beautiful environment and very welcoming
HB is a protected Independent living
leads to safe environment
HB is 10 minutes from family.
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Early dementia, confusion, limited memory,
Demenia leads to elder abuse
Moments of clarity could lead would to people taking advantage of her.
Answers door to strangers
Mom uses a walker for mobility; lives in LR and bedroom space only.
Falls go unreported
Cooking is fire hazard
No cooking is poor nutrition
Meals are frozen; not nutritious
risk of drug irregularities
alone without companionship
no activities
except TV
Companion expense
House is not secure
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Additional problems with T care of M:
Trish leaves Mom alone and leaves town without telling anyone.
Trish has neglected Mom by failing to report falls, illness and skin issues.
Mom's savings have been depleted.
T has used up all of Mom's resources to fund her lifestyle and projects.
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Mom only has Soc Security check and one small source - not enough to be safe in a healthy environment.
Would not be able to have sitters.
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Condo bought with K's retirement savings. K is 66 - needs $ now.
S is retiring 3 months; needs $ now to invest for retirement with economy down.
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HB has easy transition from AL to Health Care when needed.
HB gives Mom a social environment with friends her age
HB coordinates all the health care, doctors visits, provision of drugs in safe environment.
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Mom shouldn't be left alone without supervision.
An identity tag is not a substitute for safety for a 90 0yr old female.
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Trish has limited income and no significant resources to care for Mom.
If she has a job, she would have to hire sitters for her care while gone.
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Again, Mom does not drive, has early dementia, frequent confusion,
cannot handle finances, cannot go outside alone, cannot cook - fire risk, poor nutrition
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K's condo is being sold next month no matter what decision is made about Mom's future.
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Beautiful HB Room is available now and maybe not again until much later.
Mom needs to move to HB now while she is mobile and can meet friends and enjoy the amenities of a quality residence.
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K/S notified T that M couldn't longer stay alone
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K & S have provided thousands of $ in funds to T for her education and expenses in hopes of getting a job she likes.
She has held short-term jobs over the years and always quits and returns home to live.
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Mom has been visibly upset by T trying to get Mom to stay to protect T's need for a house.
T has shown signs of being a bully to an elder person.
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Alternative to HB is Friendship Manor, not recommended by Mom's physician.
FM is a nursing home environment that Mom would receive less quality of life.
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NO
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HB is affordable - Mom has the $ to cover the costs of HB.
Mom's SS check covers over half the costs of HB.
Mom also has access to new income - the Veteran's spouse funds if she moves into an assisted living place and needs personal care.
She does not have access to this new $ if she stays in K's house.
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T promised but never repaid M when the credit card abuse was discovered.
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T took M to attorney to ask about changing POA and eviction process.
K/S were not threatened by hearing this. The goal remains the same - what is the best care and quality of life for M.
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Mom qualities for HB now but Obama care & healthcare issues may not support Mom going to an assisted living facility if she does not go now.
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When T was notified that the condo might be sold, she made Mom's environment untenable by promoting the impact on T as the reason they should stay at condo.
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Any arrangement with T in charge of M care is unacceptable for her health and safety.
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Mom would no longer have to pay home expenses of food, transportation, elec, water, TV, lawn, maintenance,
She wold also not pay for sitters as HB is care round the clock.
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