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Humor selectors, pages, etc.
Democrats Scramble To Find Replacement For Retiring Mitt Romney
By HatetheSwamp
September 13, 2023 1:47 pm
Category: Humor

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WASHINGTON, D.C. — The Democratic Party was left scrambling for a replacement today, as long-time faithful Senator Mitt Romney of Utah announced he would not be seeking re-election.

searching for a replacement candidate, concerned that conservatives in Utah could flip the seat Republican...

According to sources in the Romney camp, the Senator plans to retire to the plains of Namibia to spend more time with his fellow rhinoceros family.

S'true, s'true.

Cited and related links:

  1. babylonbee.com

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Comments on "Democrats Scramble To Find Replacement For Retiring Mitt Romney":

  1. by Ponderer on September 13, 2023 5:41 pm

    So what was wrong with Romney anyways? Why is the Republican party pissed off at him?

  2. by Curt_Anderson on September 13, 2023 5:41 pm
    He voted twice to impeach Trump.

  3. by oldedude on September 13, 2023 7:07 pm
    Seriously, the fact that you don't see anything wrong with him should be your answer.

  4. by HatetheSwamp on September 14, 2023 3:39 am

    Yeah, OD.

    It's true that MAGAs call every GOP who's not rabid for Trump a Rino. But, Romney deserves the appellation. He's moderate...independent...like you and me.

    That line:

    "According to sources in the Romney camp, the Senator plans to retire to the plains of Namibia to spend more time with his fellow rhinoceros family," is one of the BEE's best of all time.

    pb's a GOP because pb has a home there. The GOP is the home of openness and inclusion, acceptance, tolerance, diversity and, most of all, FREETHINKING. The party of Ted Cruz is the party of Romney, Collins and Murkowski. And, that's just fine.

    po's questions, "So what was wrong with Romney anyways? Why is the Republican party pissed off at him?" say a ton.

    GOPs aren't pi$$ed with him. Still, he's not the most popular kid in the class.

    Here's the thing, though, when a Dem Senator eschews the lockstepping and the fascism and is as independent and moderate as is Romney, Dems are pi$$ed. But,...

    ...and this is the point: We chortle. We Ljoke about it. We're about freedom in every way. We're the people of Republic.

    They, AIN'T.

    Bahahahahahahahahahaha baha baha keehee, ha.

  5. by Ponderer on September 14, 2023 7:07 am

    "He voted twice to impeach Trump." -Curt

    Well... yeah! Why shouldn't he have? Trump was caught on tape committing a felony among other crimes the first time. And he was witnessed by the entire country trying to overturn the results of a free and fair presidential election on the second. Voting to impeach him on both counts was the right and patriotic thing to do.

    I mean, what did the Republican party expect him to do ferfucksake? Do the absolutely wrong and treasonously unpatriotic thing by voting to acquit him and allow him to stay in offi


    Oh. Right. Republicans. Silly me.



    You know, the other day I was trying to come up with a really disgusting and over-the-top obscene new epithet for them. But after quite awhile at it, I just couldn't think of anything more disgusting and over-the-top obscene than "Republicans".

  6. by Donna on September 14, 2023 7:35 am

    Not that this will happen, but I'm curious: If the Republican nomination came down to Trump and Romney, who would you vote for, od? Same question, Hate.

  7. by HatetheSwamp on September 14, 2023 8:21 am

    Donna,

    Duh. I'd back Romney. Romney is one of my fave GOPs.

    And, he symbolizes the absolute truth that the GOP is the home of openness and inclusion, acceptance, diversity tolerance and freethinking. Moderate GOPs don't leave the party to become Independent. Moderate Dems do.

  8. by Indy! on September 14, 2023 10:43 am

    Yeah, no peebs.
    pewresearch.org

  9. by Ponderer on September 14, 2023 11:41 am

    "Romney is one of my fave GOPs." -Hate

    Mine too, Bill.

  10. by Ponderer on September 14, 2023 11:47 am

    Yeah, Indy!. It does look like the Leaning Independents are about a wash between the Big Two.

    So who do those No Lean Independents end up voting for do you think? They probably should have asked the No Lean Independents, "Okay but if you had to lean, which way would you lean?"

  11. by oldedude on September 14, 2023 12:43 pm
    Not that this will happen, but I'm curious: If the Republican nomination came down to Trump and Romney, who would you vote for, od?

    I'd think very seriously about writing in Tulsi and throwing my vote away in a null vote against the other two.

  12. by Ponderer on September 14, 2023 1:03 pm

    Not that this will happen, but I'm curious: If the Republican nomination came down to Trump and Romney, who would you vote for, od?

    I'd think very seriously about writing in Tulsi and throwing my vote away in a null vote against the other two." -olde dude


    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! That was a good one, od. I'll give you that. You do have your moments.

  13. by HatetheSwamp on September 14, 2023 1:27 pm

    HAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHAHA!!!! That was a good one, od. I'll give you that. You do have your moments. -po

    Yeah, OD. You're the second coming of Henny Young..."boy, are my arms tired." Baha.

  14. by HatetheSwamp on September 14, 2023 1:34 pm

    From the WaPo:

    Mitt Romney’s startling but familiar concession: The demagogues have won

    Your Swamp socks!

    washingtonpost.com

  15. by oldedude on September 15, 2023 6:49 am
    I think the funniest thing about a few of your last posts, no one bothers to check out your citation! When I hear something outrageous the first thing I think is to check the cite. It explains everything. Also, that way I can enjoy the parody. It makes it fun and don't have to worry about all the political BS of the day.

  16. by islander on September 15, 2023 7:11 am

    Mitt Romney is a decent Guy and a decent Republican, or at least what the Republicans used to be.

    "Yesterday, Senator Mitt Romney (R-UT) announced he would not run for reelection. That announcement came just as The Atlantic published an excerpt from a forthcoming biography of Romney by McKay Coppins in which Romney expressed disgust with his Republican colleagues for feeding Trump’s lies to their voters in exchange for power and acknowledged that “[a] very large portion of my party really doesn’t believe in the Constitution.”
    Coppins had access to Romney’s private journals, correspondence, and interviews. He describes Romney as isolated from other Republicans in Washington, unwelcome first because he was disgusted by Trump and vowed to be independent of him and then because, in the first impeachment trial, Romney voted to convict on one of two charges.

    Romney said that “[a]lmost without exception” his Republican colleagues “shared my view of the president,” but they refused to speak up out of fear that their voters would turn against them. Coppins recounts a weekly caucus lunch at which Republicans gave Trump a standing ovation, listened as he boasted and rambled through remarks, and then burst into laughter as soon as Trump left.

    That loyalty appears to have been behind leaders’ refusal to address rumors of violence on January 6, 2021. According to Coppins, on January 2, 2021, Senator Angus King (I-ME) warned Romney that a high-ranking Pentagon official had told King that right-wing extremists online appeared to be planning to attack the government on January 6 to stop what Trump had told them was the stealing of the 2020 presidential election. They talked of guns and arson and bombs, and they talked of targeting the traitors in Congress, among whom they counted Romney for his vote to convict Trump on one count in his first impeachment trial. King was concerned for Romney’s safety.

    Romney promptly texted then–Senate majority leader Mitch McConnell (R-KY) to recount the conversation. “There are calls to burn down your home, Mitch; to smuggle guns into DC, and to storm the Capitol,” Romney wrote. “I hope that sufficient security plans are in place, but I am concerned that the instigator—the President—is the one who commands the reinforcements the DC and Capitol police might require.” McConnell never answered." *

    * HCR

  17. by oldedude on September 15, 2023 9:30 am
    Awwwwwwwww mannnnnn, you just killed any humor that on this site! Oh. I know. Because the person that was shunned said something, that makes it absolutely true. Yeah, that's the ticket!

  18. by Indy! on September 15, 2023 7:02 pm

    I'd think very seriously about writing in Tulsi and throwing my vote away in a null vote against the other two.


    I will definitely vote for Tulsi (again) if she is on the ballot. And there is no such thing as a wasted vote. The more people who DON'T vote for the two major disasters parties send the message that we are tired of the same two evils. There are already more people identifying as independents as there are those still wasting their votes on the Ds or Rs respectively. It's time to put the power in our hands instead of the incompetent criminals that have been occupying DC in our lifetimes.

  19. by HatetheSwamp on September 16, 2023 4:07 pm

    Preach it, Indy! 024 is the time to vote against the Swamp, however one chooses to do it. Trump is despicable. "That feckless dementia-ridden piece of crap" is brain dead.

    It's time.

    I absolutely will vote for Tulsi if she's on anyone's ticket. In a heartbeat. Period.

    Everyone who votes for either of the major parties should be ashamed.

  20. by Curt_Anderson on September 16, 2023 6:30 pm
    Indy has one overriding criteria when it comes to deciding his vote: is the candidate a PILF?

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