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Humor selectors, pages, etc.
Awkward: Supreme Court Rules Against Affirmative Action With Affirmative Action Hire Sitting Right There
By HatetheSwamp
June 30, 2023 12:37 pm
Category: Humor

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WASHINGTON, D.C. — In an extremely awkward moment, six Supreme Court justices ruled that affirmative action is unconstitutional, completely forgetting that affirmative action hire Ketanji Brown Jackson was sitting right there next to them.

"Welp, this is kind of an uncomfortable situation," said Chief Justice John Roberts after turning in his majority opinion. "No hard feelings, ok, Ketanji? We're still invited to the cookout at your place this weekend, right?"

Roberts then slunk away with an embarrassed look on his face.

"Today is a sad day for anyone who was hired strictly based on their race, gender, and sexual orientation rather than qualifications," said White House Press Secretary Karine Jean-Pierre, who was hired strictly based on her race, gender, and sexual orientation rather than qualifications. "Ah, crap... now this is awkward."

Vice President Kamala Harris, also an identity hire with no qualifications, weighed in as well, saying: "Affirmative action is affirmative, and that's good. Without affirmative action, we will have non-affirmative action which is the worst kind of action. And that's bad. HA HA HAHAHAHAHA!"

At publishing time, Clarence Thomas had distracted himself from his awkward feeling by writing yet another brilliant opinion.


Exactly!


Cited and related links:

  1. babylonbee.com

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Comments on "Awkward: Supreme Court Rules Against Affirmative Action With Affirmative Action Hire Sitting Right There":

  1. by Curt_Anderson on June 30, 2023 1:09 pm
    HtS,
    I won't go so far as to say that you're a racist, although you might be. However, you seem to really like racist humor. Apparently, you believe that every successful Black person owes their achievements to government programs.

    For the record, Ketanji Brown Jackson, in her senior year of high school won the national oratory title at the National Catholic Forensic League championship.
    Jackson graduated from Harvard in 1992 with a Bachelor of Arts, magna cum laude.
    From 1992 to 1993, Jackson worked as a staff reporter and researcher for Time magazine, attending Harvard Law School shortly afterwards.
    She was a supervising editor of the Harvard Law Review and graduated in 1996 with a Juris Doctor, cum laude.


  2. by HatetheSwamp on June 30, 2023 1:37 pm

    Racist humor!!!!!? How 'bout sexist, too?

    What, as po'd say, the EFF!!!!!?

    This tangentially about race, at best. What it's about is "that feckless dementia-ridden piece of crap's" string pullers' pander-laden electioneering.

    The, as Isle! himself called him, Doddering Old Fart promised that, no matter who may or not be most qualified, his first nominee to the Supreme Court would be a black, uh, birthing person, keeheeheeheeheeheeheehee, ha.

    Ketanji Brown Jackson absolutely is an affirmative action hire...an effin diversity hire, chosen because of her skin color and the fact that she possesses a vigina...and, nuthin more.


  3. by Curt_Anderson on June 30, 2023 1:54 pm
    HtS,
    You act like the default SCOTUS nominee should be a generic White male.

    Even with Brown-Jackson, the Supreme Court is more White than America. As of 2021, non-Hispanic whites representing 59.3% of the US population. The Supreme Court is also more male than America.

    Don't you believe that it's a good to have a Supreme Court (and Congress, etc.) that reflects America's demographics?


  4. by HatetheSwamp on June 30, 2023 2:27 pm

    Don't be ridiculous. The compelling truth is, undeniably, that the Doddering Old Fart's string pullers had him promise to nominate a birthing person of color and James Clyburn, to whom Clouseau owed a historic political debt, backed Ketanji Brown Jackson.

    Done deal.

    Period.


  5. by Curt_Anderson on June 30, 2023 2:48 pm
    HtS,
    You are not only wrong generally, you are wrong specifically.

    Jim Clyburn wanted South Carolina Judge J. Michelle Childs to be Biden's Supreme Court pick, not KBJ.
    wfae.org


  6. by HatetheSwamp on June 30, 2023 3:03 pm

    Oops. Sorry.

    Still, the Former Truck Driver promised to deliver a birthing person of color no matter who may have been better qualified...

    ...and the reason that this BEE article is such a knee-slapper over here is that we're so happy with ourselves for believing in a meritocracy and convinced that y'nes are silly and cute for opposing one.


  7. by Curt_Anderson on June 30, 2023 3:20 pm
    HtS,
    Do you seriously believe that the other Supreme Court justices all have better academic and professional credentials than KJB? They don't.





  8. by HatetheSwamp on June 30, 2023 3:54 pm

    I believe that "that feckless dementia-ridden piece of crap" put Ketanji Brown Jackson in the position that she wiljustified lying, and justifiedly so, the butt of the BEE'S joke. Whatever her genuine qualifications, she nuthin more than a diversity hire.


  9. by Curt_Anderson on June 30, 2023 4:04 pm
    I stand corrected. You ARE a racist!


  10. by oldedude on June 30, 2023 6:32 pm
    It's not a stretch to say pedojoe has taken EEO rules and tossed them out the window. And he's been very public about it.

    I don't doubt brown is extremely qualified. And he wasn't looking at "the best" hire and made that very clear. My view is she would have made the top two or three of any process looking for the best hire also. Again, pedojoe wasn't looking for that. He was looking at race, gender, etcetcetc FIRST. then weighing the options from there.

    Had he said at the beginning that he was looking for the best qualified, I'd be okay with her.


  11. by Indy! on June 30, 2023 7:23 pm
    Wow. Babylon Bee says the quiet part out loud. What next? The Klan's Facebook page posting open house invitations to the next cross burning? 😂

    Who warned everybody this was happening? Oh right - this guy...



  12. by Curt_Anderson on June 30, 2023 7:29 pm
    Classic Indy! in a good way! Great before and after image.


  13. by Indy! on June 30, 2023 7:31 pm
    How did I miss this thread before? The board segregationists are arguing about Biden's hire when they just appointed a rapist Clown and a religious nutjob who makes wahhabism look like a moderate choice? 😂


  14. by Indy! on June 30, 2023 7:39 pm
    Thanks Curt. Hey - you know what's going to be REALLY awkward? When the Supreme Clowns repeal the 14th Amendment and then ask Clarence Thomas to write the majority opinion to give it a faint whiff of credibility. 😉


  15. by HatetheSwamp on July 1, 2023 5:23 am

    Of course, the Supreme Court can't, as po'd say, EFFIN repeal the 14th Amendment. But,...

    ...what they've already done, IMO, is issue decisions that, for all practical purposes, pretend away the 14th Amendment. And, they've always gotten it right.


    Curt,

    Of course, it depends on how you define racism. It astounds me that, back in the day, when I was voting for HHH, I, with other progressives, were all over King's "content of their character" assertion:

    "I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character."

    Amazingly, I still am...and today's self-proclaimed progressives call that racism.

    Baha baha bahahahahahahahahahaha baha.

    If holding steadfastly to the ideals of the "I have to dream" speech makes me a racist, I'll invoke the wisdom of Martin Luther King, Jr and wear the label proudly.

    Oy freakin vey! How what it means to be a progressive has deteriorated into absurdity.


  16. by oldedude on July 1, 2023 6:08 am
    "I have a dream that my four little children will one day live in a nation where they will not be judged by the color of their skin but by the content of their character."

    If holding steadfastly to the ideals of the "I have to dream" speech makes me a racist, I'll invoke the wisdom of Martin Luther King, Jr and wear the label proudly.


    I remember watching that speech on TV when he was on the National Mall. It made so much sense then, as it does now. Especially after 40 years of working with every race, creed, color, national origin, and religion.

    Just remember, this is the new form of segregation.



  17. by HatetheSwamp on July 1, 2023 6:22 am

    OD,

    As they say across the pond, BANG ON!


  18. by Indy! on July 1, 2023 6:44 am

    The Repub Clowns are the last people who should be pretending they were hired based on the content of their character.


  19. by Donna on July 1, 2023 1:03 pm

    The only MLK quote racist Whites know is "I have a dream". If they listened to some of his speeches, as I have, they probably wouldn't like Dr King at all.


  20. by Ponderer on July 1, 2023 1:37 pm

    "The compelling truth is, undeniably, that the Doddering Old Fart's string pullers had him promise to nominate a birthing person of color and James Clyburn, to whom Clouseau owed a historic political debt, backed Ketanji Brown Jackson." -Hate




    Uh huh.




    Bill, Trump promised in no uncertain terms that he would only appoint Supreme Court justices who would overturn Roe v. Wade. And that's exactly what he did!

    Whatthefuck kinda Affirmative Action is THAT fer fucksake, you flaming hypocritical asshole?



  21. by Ponderer on July 1, 2023 1:41 pm

    I swear to FuckingGod... A bolt of lightning ought to strike any bigoted racist like Hate who EVER quotes Martin Luther King Jr in their attempts to justify their despicably rasist and putrid bigotry and repression of a minority.


  22. by Ponderer on July 1, 2023 2:00 pm

    Here's the thing, Bill. Over the decades, how many exceptionally qualified minority members for the Supreme Court were simply automatically not even considered because they weren't white?

    It happened with women too. It's happened with every catagory other than white male you can think of.

    It was ages overdue by the time the first woman and black or minority person was ever allowed to even be on the initial list for consideration. For many decades, this country operated under and institutional "affirmative action" that would only consider white males for pretty much all political positions in this country.

    But as long as it has taken to get civil rights just up to this level, you and your MAGA Republican Lemmings are gonna drag us backward now?


    Fuckyoupeople, Bill. You are heartless, inhuman monsters.




  23. by HatetheSwamp on July 1, 2023 2:12 pm

    po,

    I was a progressive who believed King's message back in the day. Thing is, I haven't changed.

    What it means to be a progressive has. I still believe "the content of their character" thing. And, no matter what you believed back then, you are a racist now.


  24. by HatetheSwamp on July 2, 2023 4:12 am

    Tulsi (for President):

    "Affirmative Action ruling is a welcome blow to society's increasing racialization, esp anti-White racism. Supreme Court: “Eliminating racial discrimination means eliminating all of it.” Racism is an evil all of us should fight against, regardless of our skin color or political party."

    Preach it!!!!!

    twitter.com


  25. by Ponderer on July 2, 2023 10:17 am

    "society's increasing racialization -Tulsi

    Oh how I would dearly love to hear her expound in great detail upon just exactly what she means by that trio of words...


  26. by oldedude on July 2, 2023 12:05 pm
    Yes! For you there's all the trees and no forest!


  27. by HatetheSwamp on July 3, 2023 6:08 am

    I think you lose the point because you buy into the racialization.


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