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Gay & Lesbian selectors, pages, etc.
Parents Just Relieved Teen Who Came Home Drunk Wasn't Drinking Bud Light
By HatetheSwamp
April 15, 2023 10:16 am
Category: Gay & Lesbian

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D@ang,

It's fun not being woke!


NEW BRITAIN, PA Local parents Tim and Julia Yoder were understandably upset when their 17-year-old daughter Carlie came home drunk last weekend. However, their anger quickly turned to relief upon learning that Carlie had not, in fact, been consuming Bud Light.

"I mean, we were certainly disappointed that she was drinking while underage," her father Tim noted. "But at the same time, we're glad that she was responsible enough to choose a less-woke brand of alcohol."

Carlie's mother Julia said they tried hard to raise their daughter right and instill her with strong values. "I'm not proud of this, but both Carlie's father and I experimented with Bud Light when we were younger," Julia said. "I'm very proud that we raised our daughter to make better life choices and avoid some of the mistakes we made in the past."

For her part, Carlie said the temptation to drink woke beer was definitely there. "Some of the kids had Bud Light at the party. Someone even brought some of those commemorative Dylan Mulvaney cans," she said. "But I knew deep down that was wrong, so I just pounded a 12-pack of Yuengling and called it a night."


Trust good ol pb: Anheuser-Busch CEO Brendan Whitworth ain't laughing.

Baha baha bahahahahahahahahahaha baha baha!


Cited and related links:

  1. babylonbee.com

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Comments on "Parents Just Relieved Teen Who Came Home Drunk Wasn't Drinking Bud Light":

  1. by Hunter28 on April 15, 2023 10:31 am

    The fewer people who drink Bud Light, the less money Anheuser-Busch can donate to Republican candidates.

    Not sure why you're flogging this dead horse.


  2. by HatetheSwamp on April 15, 2023 10:38 am

    If you hang around, you'll realize that I regularly destroy all things woke.

    And, this Bud Light thing will be huuuuuuuuuge. Historic.


  3. by Hunter28 on April 15, 2023 11:01 am

    You're not destroying anything. You're making yourself look childish and petty. In the process, you're doing a disservice to the things you claim to care about.


  4. by HatetheSwamp on April 15, 2023 11:42 am

    I am enjoying the reality that Alissa Heinerscheid, Brendan Whitworth and that merry band of Anheuser-Busch wokesters have evaporated $6,000,000,000 in corporate value in, what?, a week?

    I'm merely noting the SELF-destruction. Also celebrating it!

    Sweeeeeeeeeeeeet!


  5. by oldedude on April 16, 2023 8:47 pm
    1. Hunter. do you live near Ottawa? and were bourne in GB? Honest question.


  6. by Hunter28 on April 17, 2023 12:55 am
    Thanks to airplanes everything is near. And I just answered you second question.


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