“We are proud to announce that the pigeon has accepted an invitation to speak at this year’s event,” said CPAC representative, Buck Brobert to a crowd of conservative journalists who spontaneously began chanting “Lock her up,” “Build the wall,” and “Four more poops!”
When reached for comment, the pigeon responded to the CPAC’s announcement with a confirmatory, “Coo.”
At publishing time, the pigeon’s newly-created Twitter account had already accrued over 1 million followers.
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