AdviceShould You Make That Short Joke?
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Have you got a short joke brewing in your head? Use this handy tool to help you decide if you should crack it out.

               
Go home now.
YES
Does your joke refer to the weather?
NO
Do you know me?
 
 




YES


NO



 
Are you a member of my family?
 
Have you said any other words to me?
 


YES

NO




YES

NO

Fair play, there's probably a history of this sort of shit.
Are you significantly taller than me?
 
Are you a customer of some company on whose behalf I am currently acting as a representative?
What is wrong with you? Have you no social skills?



NO

YES



NO

YES

 
Are you shorter than me?
YES
Would I be comfortable telling you to fuck off?
NO
Are you actually a stand-up comedian?
Please get someone else to do your shopping in future. Chances are you don't have a wife or friends, but there may be a sibling or care worker who can take care of your needs so no one has to put up with your shit.


NO



YES


YES

NO

Get out.
 
Go ahead. I probably will, but no doubt we'll both have a sense of humour about it.
Alright then. A job's a job.
Nope.