These are some of my favorite quotes/sayings! :D Enjoy!


I fear one day I'll meet God, he'll sneeze, and I won't know what to say.

I don't have ADHD I just--HEY LOOK A SQUIRREL!!!!!

I find 'Good morning' a contradiction of terms.

If ignorance is bliss...why aren't more people happy?

The spiders have to be individually milked...and they do NOT like it. --GET SMART

I have CDO. It's like OCD, but all of the letters are in alphabetical order...like they should be.

Automatic doors make me feel like a JEDI!

The dyslexic cow goes 'OOM'.

If people were meant to pop out of bed, we'd all sleep in toasters.

I couldn't fix your brakes so I made your horn louder....

If the world didn't suck, we'd all fall off.

If it weren't for physics and law enforcement, I'd be unstoppable.

Oh, me? I'm just laughing at the conversation going on in my head.

I'm not random you just can't think as fast as me.

When the life hands you lemons, make grape juice, and then stand back and watch the world wonder how the heck you did it.


I love these quotes! You? :D