I hate to dance. I can't dance. The Va-Vas make fun of me when I dance.
True		False

I make out with people at stoplights.
True		False

I have a really big "boo-tay."
True		False

I have gotten laid in this lifetime.
True		False

I have seen Chad Larson's glowing ass.
True		False

I always must go to the gym, even though most of my other friends are going to eat and freeze in Port Townsend.
True		False

I am stalked by boys with a fondness for horses.
True		False

I am getting overclemmed.
True		False

I am comfortable making out with my best friends of either sex.
True		False

I am a evil lady that is not attending the rodeo or high school this year.
True		False

I have gotten a ticket for throwing away my garbage.
True		False

I have a gay purple cat that likes the porno and the bottle.
True		False

I have made earnest attempts to "Pinkie Promise" someone while shitfaced.
True		False

I am a ass-kicking sap that takes my red-headed boyfriend on sunrise picnics.
True		False

I was a lesbian for the month of August.
True		False

I lust after guys with names like "Gym Boy" and "Hall Boy."
True		False

I got up and moved to the Golden State.
True		False

I got hit on by my own cousin. (Twice removed, but it counts in the gene pool.)
True		False

I have an unhealthy attraction to boys named "David."
True		False

I am frequently a victim of dog-piling in the morning.
True		False

When I get drunk, clothes come off.
True		False

Highly religious "Proddie" boys are my shameful secret indulgence.
True		False

I have unwavering loyalty to Leann Rimes.
True		False

My stage name is "Kelly" as I am a member of the hottest R&B group in America today: Destiny's Stepchild.
True		False