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So I have an eccentric relative...

Posted by Anonymous User 
Anonymous User
So I have an eccentric relative...
November 29, 2009 11:21PM
who believes that she is an animal-whisperer who can heal animals over great geographical distances and even find out about their past lives. She is taking some classes to get some "certification" for it. Furthermore she is now beginning to make a business of metaphysical stuff. Someone actually paid her $50 to "cleanse" their new home. To make matters worse (funnier?) she has a gay boyfriend who is half her age and using her as his sugar mamma, and she puts up with it because she thinks he was her husband in a past life. I didn't ask too many details because it takes a lot of concentration to stifle your laughter while you're cringing.

Maybe it is the novelty of it, but I think this is kind of out-there compared to the more conventional forms of spirituality. And she may have crossed a line into malevolencey, since she is unwittingly scamming people and getting scammed because of her stupid beliefs. Next time I see her and she brings up the animal healing/past lives, should I laugh in her face and tell her what I think? Is she providing a legitimate service by serving up hot steaming bullshiit because that's what people want? Is there some legitimate middle ground between polite tolerance of some beliefs but not others?
Re: So I have an eccentric relative...
November 30, 2009 01:51AM
Hey!

The main thing is, is she enjoying it and having fun!

"Is she providing a legitimate service by serving up hot steaming bullshiit because that's what people want?"

Yup! And it's being done on a much grander scale than she is doing it! And both sides are quite happy with what they're doing and getting!

If you can...find out what (and let me know) you have to do to become "certified"! My grand daughter is trying to start a house cleaning buisiness...She'd see me as her hero (and maybe cut me in) if I could show her how to do it metaphysically at 50 bucks a house! smileys with beer
Jun
Re: So I have an eccentric relative...
November 30, 2009 06:32AM
Is "cleaning" up my house "spiritually" less involving than doing it "physically"?
Might give a go at it if that is the case..tongue sticking out smiley

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
- Juni {^á´¥^}


"Don't judge other people just because they sin differently from you!" ~ Anon

Three things you (probably) don't know about Islam
[www.youtube.com]

Welcome To Belgistan -- The New Muslim Capital Of Europe
[www.youtube.com]

Re: So I have an eccentric relative...
November 30, 2009 06:56AM
A friend of mine who I haven't seen in a few years was pulling $1500/session for "energy work". Back in 2001, one of the last times I saw her, she was at my place and offered to perform energy work on me. "Sure", I said. As I laid on my bed, relaxed, she moved her hands all over my body a few inches above my skin/clothing. Every minute or so, she'd ask me "Do you feel that?" and I'd tell her the truth, "no". As the session continued, she became increasingly astounded (frustrated?) that I didn't feel the energy between her hands and my body. I really didn't feel anything.

If you're paying $1500/session for that, you're probably more inclined to imagine that you felt "energy". Plus, I think that some of her clients probably agreed that they felt energy to spare her feelings. Based on her reaction, I'm probably the first person who ever told her the truth.
Juerg
Re: So I have an eccentric relative...
November 30, 2009 07:13AM
It's probably time to stop biting your tongue when she starts doing some serious physical, emotional or financial harm to people. I don't think you do much good trying to confront people about relatively harmless things like 'cleaning' a house for $50 because they just get defensive about it anyway, but I think you need to speak up when someone is forgoing chemotherapy and mortgaging their house for energy crystal healing or whatever. Also people are usually more responsive to sense when they start doing damage because that's when doubts start creeping into their mind.
Jun
Re: So I have an eccentric relative...
November 30, 2009 07:15AM
PTTP, it has all to do with your "negative energy" that you weren't feeling anything. winking smiley

--------------------------------------------------------------------------------
- Juni {^á´¥^}


"Don't judge other people just because they sin differently from you!" ~ Anon

Three things you (probably) don't know about Islam
[www.youtube.com]

Welcome To Belgistan -- The New Muslim Capital Of Europe
[www.youtube.com]

Re: So I have an eccentric relative...
November 30, 2009 11:06AM
If she's doing this in a spirit of goodwill don't make an issue of it. There's a way of humoring superstitious people that also tells them that you don't believe in it and don't really want to hear about it wile also saying that you like them anyway.

I have an uncle who has his own "ministry"-- but no church-- and whenever he hears about a relative with a terminal illness or dementia he comes to "visit" and pressures them to donate everything they own to "the Lord"-- meaning his ministry, which consists entirely of going from death bed to death bed putting a guilt trip on vulnerable people. He's an old fashioned fire-and-brimstone preacher who terrorizes the whole family, but no one is willing to stand up to him.
Anonymous User
Re: So I have an eccentric relative...
November 30, 2009 06:37PM
Wow linc that guy sounds very unpleasant! If he is terrorizing the family, have you all considered doing an intervention style thing to tell him his attitude is not appreciated?
Re: So I have an eccentric relative...
December 01, 2009 03:46AM
I'm torn on this one.

On the one hand, I'm inclined to let innocent eccentrics enjoy themselves since it's no skin of my nose what they believe.

But she is selling her services and being exploited because of it?

I'm torn there between thinking that such ius grossly morally wrong AND thinking that a fool and his money is soon parted. I also have to think - well, we all find it objectionable that she is selling these services and being used like this. But we see it on a much grander scale when the collection plates are passed round and the donation drives fire up (and some churches practice actual tithing). I suppose what she is doing is not appreciably different in many cases (with a possibly - albeit, shaky in some cases - consideration of use that money is put to)

Also, practically, could you intervene? If you sat her down and expressed your concerns, how likely is she to respond?


Like Juerg, I'd probably say hold back unless it gets so extreme you just have to speak

FS

Every day you may make progress. Every step may be fruitful. Yet there will stretch out before you an ever-lengthening, ever-ascending, ever-improving path. You know you will never get to the end of the journey. But this, so far from discouraging, only adds to the joy and glory of the climb.
-Sir Winston Churchill
Re: So I have an eccentric relative...
December 01, 2009 04:38AM
Myce writes,

Quote
If he is terrorizing the family, have you all considered doing an intervention style thing to tell him his attitude is not appreciated?

No, they're very secretive people and he intimidates them (I've heard rumors of his ruthless lawsuits against family members over inheritance). They're all just a bunch of North Carolina hillbillies who gossip about other relatives who are trying to buy "redemption for their sins" but when their wife or husband gets sick and he comes around, they give him a bedroom, let him rant about "salvation," never talk back to him and after the funeral he walks away with a big "donation." He has some training in how to set up wills and sue people but he mainly preys on his 15 brothers and sisters and the hundreds of cousins in our clan. My dad's getting on in years and I know I'm going to have to deal with Uncle Paul one day because as soon as he learns someone is getting feeble, he's there with legal papers to sign and warnings of everlasting hellfire.
Re: So I have an eccentric relative...
December 01, 2009 04:57AM
Wow linc. What a disgusting vulture. You know, if he was all about just being there and ministering to people and "comforting" them, I'd say fine, what harm can he do. But with this monetary racket he's working, I think he should be tarred and feathered. If there really is a Hell, I believe there has got to be a special place there for bastards like him. It almost sounds like he's selling indulgences or something. The religious equal to a snake oil salesman.

.
Anonymous User
Re: So I have an eccentric relative...
December 01, 2009 05:32AM
I've often wondered if any of these feng shui contractors, energy healers, etc were sincere. From what some of you write at least some are.
Anonymous User
Re: So I have an eccentric relative...
December 01, 2009 07:25AM
Right FS. Someone else has already expressed concerns and it falls on deaf ears. Curt she is sincere and a lot of them are I think. I went to church with this relative and somebody was doing vague and symbolic "clairvoyant" readings for the audience. I was thinking, I have an imagination and with practice I could sharpen my intuition and become a "clairvoyant" also. Difference is, they believe they are tapping into something outside their own minds.
Re: So I have an eccentric relative...
December 01, 2009 08:22AM
The friend of mine who I wrote about truly believes in her energy work. Actually, she's a very nice person. But she also believes in, well, just about every new age belief that I've heard. She's not a charlatan - she's a true believer.

I guess her most outrageous belief is that she's a "walk in", meaning that an entity from another planet in the universe has taken over her person. She believes that she's had several walk in experiences. She once told me, "Spirit tells me that you've had one, possibly two walk in experiences".

Yeah, she's really out there.

According to [www.greatdreams.com]

This is where two individual souls have agreed to switch places. The first soul has gone as far as it can in its development and is ready to move on. The soul that has taken its place will serve in a different capacity than before. Normally, permission has been granted in order for this to take place. Another way to call the experience is soul transference.



Edited 1 time(s). Last edit at 12/01/2009 08:26AM by PowerToThePeople.
Re: So I have an eccentric relative...
December 04, 2009 09:34PM
On the whole subject of energy healers, shamans, healing touch practicioners, Reiki, etc:

The first thing I'd like to comment on is the science, specifically the Placebo Effect.

Researchers testing new drugs factor out 30% of the result to the Placebo Effect. They know that, given a sugar pill, 30% of test subjects will respond the same as they would to the real drug. I submit that this is a fantastic and vastly underestimated fact.

Imagine a group of 100 people with debilitating migraines. Traditional medicine might recommend MRI's, CT's, PET scans, etc. Let's say that costs $5,000 per person, for a total social cost of $500,000.

Now let's say, instead, that all 100 are told to go first to their local medicine wo/man for healing, at a cost of $50 per. We know that 30% of those folks -- 33 in all -- will respond to this, whether we say "they were healed," or "they healed themselves." The rest go on to traditional doctors.

That's $50 X 100 = $5,000, then the remaining 67 pay $5,000 for doctors = $335,000, for a total cost of $340,000. In other words, a net savings to our group of $160,000!

Now, extrapolate that to our national healthcare costs of $2.7 trillion (pretending that insurance has anything to do with delivering healthcare for a moment). Let's say half of that is broken bones and things that really require allopathic medical care. That leaves $1.35 trillion spent to treat high blood pressure, high cholesteral, migraines, backaches -- all of the things that we know respond to the Placebo Effect. Send those people first to an energy healer or a shaman or an acupuncturist, and 30% will respond with the desired result -- for a net social savings in excess of $400 billion!

That ain't hocus-pocus; that's known science and simple arithmetic.

Curt says: "I've often wondered if any of these feng shui contractors, energy healers, etc were sincere. From what some of you write at least some are."

I've spent an enormous amount of time among these folks. There are charlatans, for sure, but I'm convinced that the vast majority are honest in their convictions and well-intentioned. And, like the Native American medicine man and the sugar pill, they get results 30% of the time. So why shouldn't they be respected? I can tell you, it requires work and effort to do these things. I took a first-level Reiki course, and I gotta tell you, I'd be much more relaxed and personally indulgent having a beer and watching a couple episodes of The Office than practicing Reiki on someone. It takes effort and intention and follow-through.

So, to the topic: I have a friend who is a pet psychic and an energy healer. I don't put any of that in "quotes" because I've known her for 20 years and I'm 100% sure she believes in everything she does.

But does it work?

Consider: A person who is anguished over the loss of a pet experiences great stress. We know for sure that stress leads to disease. My friend attempts to reach out to the pet, and the owner gets a final closing communication. They are comforted. They are relieved of stress.

A person lives in a house she believes is haunted, or where she's been assaulted, or had a bad marriage, or where a parent passed away. She can't even be in her own home without feeling darkness or loss or anguish. My friend comes into their home and guides them through a cleansing ritual. In a purely psychological way, this is healing in and of itself.

It's tough sometimes, myce. My aforementioned friend went through a period where she couldn't do anything without a "sign" from "God." I wanted to throttle her more than once.

But people go through these phases along a spiritual path; and the spiritual path itself is inherently foggy and insubstantial. I would simply advise that if you challenge her beliefs, do so gently -- she'll have to come to her own conclusions, and they may not be ones that you're comfortable with, but ... that's just life.
Anonymous User
Re: So I have an eccentric relative...
December 04, 2009 09:56PM
Wow Paleo, interesting points. I don't have time to comment on it right now but will give your idea some thought. I remember reading something about the neurology of the placebo effect too and will see if I can dig that up.
Re: So I have an eccentric relative...
December 04, 2009 10:29PM
Yeah, I wish the medical community would give a little more thought to it and understand what an incredible potential is available in this effect. Right now it's treated as an obstacle to be overcome. I guess maybe because it doesn't make anyone any money.
Anonymous User
Re: So I have an eccentric relative...
December 05, 2009 12:56AM
Paleo,
You compare MRI's, CT's, PET scans, etc. with the local medicine wo/man. I've written in these forums that the efficacy is MRI's etc. is overstated and over promoted. BTW, MRI can't diagnose migraines according to WebMD.com. Of course, the local alternative healer charges less than the big hospital, but that's not how you should make a decision about your health care. The issue is that shamans, homeopaths and psychic healers have no proven efficacy--in fact they have been proven to be ineffective. However, in certain applications at least MRI's, CT's, PET scans, etc. have proven efficacy.

The real comparison you should make is between alternative medicine practitioners and keeping your money in your pocket. This is because alternative medicine is essentially the same as doing nothing. Maybe 30% of the people willingly fool themselves, but that's hardly a reason to pay for it.

Incidentally, I heard that Seventh Day Adventists are lobbying to have the cost of "healing prayer" covered in the health reform bill that's wending its way through Congress. I opppose that too.
Re: So I have an eccentric relative...
December 05, 2009 01:07AM
That's so completely illogical that I'm not quite sure how to respond to it.

It's like having someone show you how to save 30% on your mortgage and saying, "Yeah, but I'll just keep paying the extra $300." It doesn't make any sense.
Re: So I have an eccentric relative...
December 05, 2009 01:15AM
Or maybe more appropriately, it's like saying, "Since engineers don't understand how bumble bees fly -- it's just impossible -- we should remove all references to bumble bees flying from entomology textbooks."

What? If we don't understand something, we should ignore it? To what benefit?
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